BLOOD RELATIVES is a new horror-comedy with a small cast, a simple story, and so much heart and attitude. It’s a great little vampire treat for fans of this hybrid genre. On Shudder, VOD, and more. Read our full Blood Relatives movie review here!

BLOOD RELATIVES is a vampire horror-comedy starring Noah Segan, who is also the writer and director. With a runtime of just under an hour and a half (1 hour and 28 minutes, according to IMDb), this delivers exactly the story that fits perfectly with the runtime.

It’s a horror-comedy of the darker variety in terms of comedy, but not too heavy on horror. I mean, it is a vampire story, so in that sense, it’s obviously a very classic horror story.

Continue reading our Blood Relatives movie review below. Find it on Shudder now or on VOD, DVD, and Blu-ray from April 25, 2023.

It’s a family affair

The title of Blood Relatives is both very literal and a play on words. I mean, this is after all a vampire movie, so the word blood is obviously the perfect pun. We follow Francis (Noah Segan) just trying to live his best life.

He looks around 35 years old but is actually a 115-year-old vampire. A Yiddish-speaking vampire at that. And yes, he did survive the holocaust and has the “tattoo” to prove it. Since surviving the holocaust, he has been in the US. There he is constantly on the run since no one can continue to look 35 forever without people taking notice.

His constant road trip takes place on the American backroads in his beat-up muscle car. In other words, a car he can care for and continue to do repairs on without being dependent on others. Just the way he likes it.

But one day a teenager shows up. Her name is Jane (Victoria Moroles) and she says she’s his daughter. Needless to say, he finds this very hard to believe. However, she has the fangs to prove it!

BLOOD RELATIVES (2022) review

Noah Segan and Victoria Moroles

For the core story about the 115-year-old vampire daddy and his teenage daughter to work, the two actors portraying these roles need to be convincing. Fortunately, Noah Segan (Scare Package) and Victoria Moroles (Teen Wolf, The Wilds) work perfectly in their respective roles.

In fact, one thing that was a surprising and rather delicious little twist is how the teenager Jane is almost better at being an adult. She has been living a normal life with love and pain and responsibility. All while the world’s oldest 30-something bachelor only answers to himself.

This becomes especially obvious when the two go on the road to find out if this whole “family thing” is even possible. Victoria Moroles as Jane is clearly more worldly in many ways than Noah Segan’s Francis. It’s a small detail, but one that makes for some solid key scenes in them establishing their relationship as father and daughter.

Along with Noah Segan and Victoria Moroles, we also see quite a few familiar faces in supporting roles. These include Tracie Thoms (Truth Be Told) and Josh Ruben (A Wounded Fawn).

Watch Blood Relatives on Shudder or VOD

The vampire horror-comedy is both written and directed by Noah Segan. We’ve watched and reviewed quite a few movies with Noah Segan as an actor. From Follow (2015) to Camera Obscura (2017) and The Pale Door (2020). With Blood Relatives, it’s the first time we’re getting a feature film he has written and directed. And I really enjoyed it.

I both hope and expect that there are many more to come – and that he will continue to star in them as well, whenever it makes sense. In the case of this movie, it made perfect sense!

If we did half ratings here at Heaven of Horror, it would land on 3½ instead of the official 3 out of 5. This is just to make it clear that this movie is definitely worth checking out. Both due to the humor and the whole vampire plot. Mostly, however, it’s the character-driven aspect that makes this story work so well for me.

BLOOD RELATIVES will be out on VOD, Digital, DVD, and Blu-Ray starting April 25, 2023. It was released on Shudder on November 22, 2022.

Details

Director: Noah Segan
Writer: Noah Segan
Cast: Noah Segan, Victoria Moroles, Tracie Thoms, C.L. Simpson

Plot

Francis, a 115-year-old Yiddish-speaking vampire, still looks 35. He’s been roaming American backroads in his beat-up muscle car for decades, keeping to himself and liking it that way. One day, Jane, a teenager, shows up. She says she’s his daughter, and she’s got the fangs to prove it. They go on the road, deciding whether to sink their teeth into family life.

I write reviews and recaps on Heaven of Horror. And yes, it does happen that I find myself screaming, when watching a good horror movie. I love psychological horror, survival horror and kick-ass women. Also, I have a huge soft spot for a good horror-comedy. Oh yeah, and I absolutely HATE when animals are harmed in movies, so I will immediately think less of any movie, where animals are harmed for entertainment (even if the animals are just really good actors). Fortunately, horror doesn't use this nearly as much as comedy. And people assume horror lovers are the messed up ones. Go figure!
Karina "ScreamQueen" Adelgaard
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